The BEST of you…
What does that look like anyways? Does it bubble with enthusiasm, dancing around like a ballerina on opening night? Or is it grounded, empowered, and listens to the world with intention. Perhaps your best version carries the weight of the world on its shoulders, but makes it look easy… Whatever it looks like, when you’re at your best the stars and your heart align, your mind clear from nonsense, and you’re simply content in the world as it flows past–you can take on anything.
This version though, who’s lucky enough to know it? Is it reserved only for loved ones, quickly to be locked away behind doors, mask in place, ready to present a simplified safe version? Or does the world get to experience the real you and what you have to offer?
My best version of self is proudly on display every Monday to Friday, 8:30am until 2:30pm.
I work in a public school, and give A LOT of energy. I work with immeasurable patience, smiles that never end, and a bottomless energy supply that grants me the ability to embrace full Jim Carey mode. I am an anchor, a best friend, and a teacher all rolled into one. These kids need the best of me, and I give it to them.
But, this Jim Carrey mode is not genuine me. It’s more of a super animated, over the top, what the hell is she on kinda version–something you gotta pay to see–HAH! We all offer the world alternate versions of ourselves though, depending on who you’re with or what you’re doing. Like at work for example: My work version is carefully crafted and sculpted from the best of me, because these kids need it. Sometimes they feel broken, and need something over the top to light them up.
But, this comes at a price. While I have learnt the skill of displaying endless energy, it is merely an illusion, not a reality. Plunking myself into the driver’s seat at the end of a long day, eyes fighting against me and desperate for a nap, but knowing my own little ones are waiting on me pushes me to keep going. Their needs, their wants, their demands… testing my already shaken patience. “Ya, ya, whatever… Fine… Just do that…” Words of a momma that just doesn’t really care.
This is not a price I wish to pay.
Perhaps you can relate? Exhausted from a day in the world, returning home where you feel comfortable to let your guard down, resulting in a less than welcoming version of yourself. You may lash out unintentionally. You tell yourself, “it’s ok, they’ll understand,” and hopefully they do…
The best of you, the worst of you, and every version in between… Take a moment to think about what they look like. Also, consider when and where those versions are in play, perhaps dive into the why? Like why does my short tempered grump come out–because I’m tired, obviously. The equally beautiful and unfortunate thing about being at peace in our home, and comfortable with the people we surround ourselves with, is that we simply let our frustrations of the day fall off us, and often into the laps of those we love. We don’t mean to give them the worst of us, but in a world that always wants more and demands every available resource you have, you’re often left with barely enough energy to offer the “that’ll do” version.
Back to your best, and who’s lucky enough to know it? And more importantly, who do you want to know it–and do they actually get it?
It kinda sucked realizing that my work self uses up all the resources needed to be my best. In that moment a dark cloud of negativity fell upon me… Shouldn’t I be saving my best self for my my own family? Yes! Absolutely yes! But… Shouldn’t that have been obvious?
That’s the beautiful thing about self-reflection. We spend our whole life learning and growing, and when we take a moment to reflect we are given the opportunity to remember what takes priority in our life. It’s an important practice, taking time to reflect that is, for this is when you learn who you are today, where you want to be, and decide whether or not these currently align.
So, now here I go, off to discover the ways in which I can find balance between my super animated Jim Carrey work self, and storing away enough energy to share my best with the ones I love most.
How about you? Take this moment to stop. Breathe. Reflect. And determine who gets the BEST of you.
If you enjoyed this, please consider subscribing to my newsletter! You can do that by going back to the main page, or just by clicking here. Thank you!